Different Realities…
Art : Bella Ding.
By Sakuan.
DIFFERENT REALITIES.
HELLO Ellie,
This is a rather complicated perspective on things, to say the least, segregation, I wonder why the world is the way it is, I wonder why for some reason we have to be different, not only different culturally but also physically, literally physical, physically in both appearance and to some extent functionality. Why are Asians found in Asia, Africans in Africa, why do people of lighter skin get affected more by the sun than people with darker skin, and the list goes on and on, segregated by nature perhaps? These are just but some of the questions and wonders that keep me up all night. Is there a reason why we are all so segregated, some dark-skinned, others light-skinned. The answer to this can somewhat be explained by science and the best we can do right now is the evolution theory, but that’s the thing, at the end of the day it is just a theory, an evolution theory, as of today that is the best explanation of how and what we are that we can come up with, I can’t stress that enough, that is the best we can do for now and as time goes by we will eventually figure out why this is the case. But for us to start this process of wonder, we have to know exactly when is the beginning of time and how the world came to be, even with that, the best explanation that our technology and scientific endeavors can give us is yet another theory, the Big Bang theory. At the end of the day they are just theories and some of these theories can’t be proven to an exact certainty, for one the recreation of the probable big bang isn’t possible or is yet to be possible, in layman’s terms according to the big bang theory something came out of nothing, a miracle at that in some people’s understanding. I wonder where we come from, I wonder how we came to be, I wonder what it was like to live in the eras of no technology, medicine, or rights, I’m glad to exist in today’s day and age, I’m glad I wasn’t there to experience all the misery, I’m glad to have experienced life with modern technology, modern education and advanced medicinal facilities, I’m lucky but also human so I can’t help but imagine and wonder what it was like, they say curiosity killed the cat, fair enough but that begs a question from me, what was the cat so curious about that warranted its death?
Science has a lot of theories from different mouths, though fair, it still bugs me to even have that thought, mainly because all that brings about is disagreements amongst scientists on their different theories and that to me is the sad part. In recent history, religion has been debunked more and more by science hence religion isn’t the go-to for more explanation anymore, at least in the west it’s not, science is the new religion, and when there is a complicated difference in opinions amongst scientist, which is to be expected by all means. It still leaves a sour taste in my mouth when I hear of scientist hiding their findings from other scientists for monetary gain, this to me is history repeating itself all over again, the same thing that happened to religion is happening to science, and that is a sad reality I’m yet to fully come to terms with. Board-certified scientists swearing to different opinions on the same subject under oath in the court of law is mind-boggling to me.
A LITTLE DREAM.
A little dream of me, let me tell you about it, please let me tell you about it. Life is precious, so you’ve heard, so I’ve heard, so I’ve experienced, with that being said it can also be hard, painful, stressful, and challenging in any way it can make itself be, but we keep on going because that is what we do, no matter how hard it gets we always encourage ourselves to keep going, other people encourage us to keep going. We all have ambitions of our own, some have powerful ones, some don’t like the sound of being in control of their lives, some do, it’s all a matter of perspective and what you want to come out of every single thing you want to do.
That is where this little dream of mine comes about, I have dreams that I would like to come to reality, but the reality of the matter is I’m scared, I’m scared from both ends of the possibilities that might come from me pursuing my dream, the fact is some dreams come true and some don’t. Success scares me and failure scares me, both in their own different and challenging ways. Then other people other than you come into the picture, sometimes what it takes for a dream to come true is not only your doing but it also involves other people, so you have to pay attention and lend out your pure trust to other people and that in itself is scary to me, I’m used to being solo in everything that I do as an artist and a writer. I have a dream, a dream that one day I’ll be successful, a dream that one day I’ll be able to sell my art (both imagery and writings) all over the world, I would love for my art to inspire other people to do and follow their heart and gut in doing what they feel is fit for their lives, but only at times because knowing when to hold their dreams and when to release them is quite important, not only in your career but also in life, with anything you want to do in life. Maybe it is the high time I define what success is to me, just maybe…
I love life, the main reason being the fact that I get to spend and experience it in the most fortunate way possible, I got to see life from a third-world country perspective and from a first-world country perspective, not a lot of people are that lucky, trust me when I say this, life is beautiful, but you have to make it beautiful. Life is nothing but a canvas, it is what you decide to put on the canvas that matters, some are happy with scribbles, and that is fine, some are happy with a clear fine beautiful painting and that is also fine. You have the freedom to put whatever you wish on the canvas, like it or not sometimes for you to accomplish this you’ll have to depend on other people, or the people around you depending on what your definition of success is, only you can accept or deny this fact, but that is the beauty of it all, that is the beauty of life itself, that truly is life.
Happiness is a luxury, cherish it if you are lucky enough to be its owner.
Death is inevitable, cherish and enjoy your life as much as you can for you get one year closer to your death with every birthday you celebrate. Perspective.
I WANT TO BE SOMETHING…
I want to be something, something important both in my life and in other people’s lives, I want to be loved by someone, I want to be someone’s “everything” and I want someone to be my “everything”, I want to be something that helps other people conquer their demons and mishaps, I want to be something that matters to someone, something that makes someone out there put down that gun and want to live and experience life more, I want to help other people have beautiful lives, I want to help them find happiness in a way, make them look forward to waking up every morning. Is this bite too much to chew for me? I wonder, am I asking too much from myself? Am I being naive about the reality of life and what I can and can’t achieve or get? Am I being silly with these thoughts right now? Can these thoughts amount to something significant? Is it okay to have the need to belong? To what extent should you belong to something if the opportunity presents itself? Why is belonging such a huge deal to human beings? What is this feeling of loneliness and what gave it the authority to hijack my life? Is it fair to have these feelings? These feelings of despair when it comes to finding someone you “click” with. It is never yesterday, today or tomorrow, time, what is the reality of time?
Both the thought and the feeling of waking up every morning and remembering that I am a nothing of no significance to no one else other than my family really makes me feel something inside, something that can’t be explained, makes me feel like an anchor has a hold of my heart and it’s weighing it down to, pulling it down to the pool of darkness we call loneliness, sometimes this feeling can be so real to the point where I feel like my heart wants to explode and sometimes I experience this feeling in tears. This is a mere reminder of what I am, human, I am human at the end of the day, what can I do about it? I’m simply a man who was once a boy, who was once an ambitious character and still am but the difference is that my ambitions back then were clouded and guarded by the people around me, people who believed in me people who told me all was possible. Now my ambitions aren’t clouded and guarded by anybody but me, now it’s my time to make or try to make my dreams come true, now it’s my time to be the difference. Of course, my family is always here to support me and I love them for that, but at the end of the day it’s all me when I close my eyes, it’s all my doing, it’s me who has to do what I see fit for me and try and help them in any way that I can, just like the way they helped me. I believe life will be more pleasant than it is right now I fall of that was accomplished. I’m not saying life is bad now, but it could always be better. It could always get better.
A LETTER TO YOU FROM ME,
YOURS TRULY.
A STRANGER.
XOXO.
Currently reading [God is Not One by Stephen Prothero]
